LIT56RD's Profile
Double bed
123
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Questions
4

Answers
12

  • Double bed Asked on January 17, 2020 in Question of the Day.

      Almost every time I read something on here.

      • 553 views
      • 13 answers
      • 5 votes
    • Every time I go to initiate I recall every no I ever heard. Some mild some quite stinging. Why risk being made to feel worse then you already do? As the old saying goes better to remain silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

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    • I don’t want to change anything. I figure if I get it I get it and I live with it. I won’t let sickness interfere with my desire for sex. Wife has a different outlook on that.

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    • Double bed Asked on December 30, 2019 in MARRIED SEX.

        Scott

        My wife had a complete hysterectomy many years ago. There has never been many menopause symptoms. She says that having delivered 3 babies vaginally everything changed in the feeling department. I think one time along long time ago she had an orgasm.  We just finished having sex and she had been quite vocal  during and replied that she needed to be careful about doing that in a motel. One other time she told me to stop because she felt that if I didn’t stop she would have peed.  Not sure if those classified as orgasms or near misses.

        • 415 views
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        • 0 votes
      • Double bed Asked on December 29, 2019 in MARRIED SEX.

          Scott

          Yes I know what responsive desire is. It is non existent. She says she feels nothing when we have sex. She describes it as being numb between the legs. I try to manually stimulate her but she will stop me and says she doesn’t like the way it feels. Oral sex is not allowed. From my perspective she simply tolerates sex with me. That one reason I am so apprehensive about initiating. I am asking someone to do something they do not enjoy. Kinda makes mea real jerk.

          • 415 views
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        • Double bed Asked on December 29, 2019 in MARRIED SEX.

            Becoming me and sd595,

            Thank you for your responses. I do not know how to explain how a guy feels with rejection. I have tried and what I get is “you shouldn’t feel that way and sex should not be THAT important “ I have to say we have sex much more frequently than we used to. Maybe I should just shut up and be glad it is not as bad as it used to be.

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          • Double bed Asked on December 29, 2019 in MARRIED SEX.

              Scott, Thank you for taking time to reply.

              I will try to answer all your questions.  Please forgive me if I miss something.

              • If I were to suggest evening sex in the morning her response would be “I don’t know what I will feel like or in what kind of mood I will be in in evening”
              • I do not initiate when I think the answer would be no.  Don’t need to test fate.
              • As an example I have been wanting to initiate this evening.  I was going to suggest I take a shower and meet her in the bedroom.  She just now jumped into the shower which means sex is out for tonight.
              • We do have a loose Saturday morning schedule.  But if there is an event or something pops up than its postponed to the next Saturday.  Nothing beyond that.  I don’t even know how that came about because it was nothing we discussed or planned it just sort of developed.
              • The massage thing only relaxes her and maker her sleepy.  And when she is sleepy you don’t think about sex.  I’ve tried.
              • The “taken” scenario would only be meet with “what the H… do you think you are doing?”
              • Yes I have changed the way I initiate.  It use to be asking permission.  Now I try to be more creative.  She NEVER is aroused so the question “Do you want to be aroused?” is a non starter.

              I have, after all these year pretty much come to the conclusion that sex is of no real interest or importance to her.  It is tough but once I realize that it did get a little easier.  Just wish it wasn’t this way.

              There you go Scott,  Thank  you for your time.  I appreciate it.

               

              sd595  Thank you for your responses.

              As I told scott we did not set out to schedule saturday sex it just developed.  I think she felt a little guilty and sort of figured if we have sex once a week that maybe I would feel better.  As far as actually scheduling there is the mind set that she won’t know how see will feel then and what mood she will be in or if there will be another conflict arise.

              • 415 views
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            • Double bed Asked on December 29, 2019 in MARRIED SEX.

                Seeking change

                I have told her that I struggle to initiate. She says just ask.  She knows what no does to me but says I need to get past that. I am not sure how long we would go if we did not have a semi schedule for Saturday morning. In many years past we would go for months and month. At its peek it was just over a year.
                At one time I asked for the 24 hr rule. She hated that and we abandon that long ago.

                • 415 views
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              • Thanks to all who have responded.  Dovegrey, I am quite surprised by your comments that at one time you thought as I do. I figured most everyone on this board has this whole God thing completely accomplished. Done completed. I have lived my entire life by the motto that nothing is free. You work for everything and somethings you don’t get because you don’t measure up or can’t accomplish it.  I am fearcely independent and tend to not lean on anyone so I am not a bother to them. If I can’t get it done on my own then I probably won’t get done.  I absolutely loath people who believe they are entitled to something just because they breath

                Again thank you to all who used their precious time to respond you have given me some things to contemplate. I will continue to read on here for I realize that all on this forum a lot smarter and understand this who sex thing better than I ever will.  And you can help many more people with your vast knowledge.

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              • I was able to respond using a different device. Thank you

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