Tantalum's Profile
Queen bed
585
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1

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41

  • Queen bed Asked 3 days ago in MARRIED SEX.

    We don’t really clean up. When we were first married we just used to let the fluids leak out on the sheets. I quite often finished on DW and we had a cuddle afterwards, it was quite sexy in some way to feel the liquid trickle down between our bodies.

    But damp sheets aren’t great for a good night sleep, so after a few years DW bought a set of old fashioned 100 % cotton handkerchiefs and she always puts one under the pillow, just in case. Then after PIV she puts it in between her legs to soak up the juices. Afterwards she drops in on the floor and it goes in the wash.

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  • DW has no problem with me taking matters into my own hands sometimes if I need to (not very often). But it would feel a bit strange if she was not in some ways connected with the act, so basically she watches me and is happy for me to finish on her body. To start with I did feel a bit self conscious doing it (is this a bit kinky?) but she told me she didn’t think there was anything wrong with it and she finds it reassuring that I her body is a turn-on if I need to masturbate.

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  • Queen bed Asked on February 29, 2020 in Pregnancy and Postpartum.

      DW’s libido definitely dropped after our baby was born but I don’t think this was due to breastfeeding, it was the emotional shock of having a baby. It was the most fundamental change to our lives and nothing could prepare you for it. And of course initially we were just so overwhelmed, marital intimacy was not on our mind.
      DW was very understanding so she offered me some MS, which was great. After about a month we attempted – very cautiously and gently – PIV, just to see what it would feel like. As DW did not have a bad time giving birth, physically she was OK but I don’t think she was ready emotionally and psychologically. So we put things on the backburner for a while. We maintained a kind-of “minimum level” of intimacy, I think mostly for the reason to keep the physical side of our marriage going, rather than out of real passion. But I’m glad to say after a few months DW gradually returned to her normal self and not only started enjoying sex but in some way became more adventurous. I think the fact that I saw her give birth meant that I had really seen everything. So for example she masturbated for me for the first time – before that she had felt too embarrassed.
      There was no connection to breastfeeding; she continued doing that for a long time after we resumed sex and it did not bother me at all. But, reading some previous posts on this forum, breastfeeding can be a turn-on for some and a turn-off for others. For us it was neither really.
      I’m sure things will return to normal, for most couples it does. The desire is in you, just latent right now. It will come back again, maybe even more intensively than before.

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    • Queen bed Asked on February 29, 2020 in Question of the Day.

        DW says there was no pain at all. However, I need to add that we had thoroughly “prepared the ground”. We had been doing mutual masturbation for about a year, during which I gradually and carefully explored DW’s lady parts with my fingers so by the time we progressed to PIV we were fairly confident that there would be no pain. She was also very well lubricated and wanted me to enter her, so I guess she was ready emotionally. (I must admit though that the whole thing was so exciting I only lasted about ten seconds…)
        I don’t know if it made a difference but she also did ballet for years during her teenage years, which may have stretched things.

        • 455 views
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        • 2 votes
      • Queen bed Asked on February 23, 2020 in Question of the Day.

          Nothing, with one exception: on a few  occasions we played a game where I gently pushed my wedding ring inside DW and then retrieved it,

           

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          • 2 votes
        • Queen bed Asked on February 14, 2020 in Intercourse (PIV) & Positions.

            Yes, definitely. When we first starting having PIV, sometimes we would just lie still for minutes without any movement and enjoy the feeling of intimacy, closeness and togetherness. For DW it was a lingering, extended “I am filled up by you” and for me it was the “I am inside you” sensation, with just concentrating on the feeling of unity without purposefully moving towards an orgasm. It’s lovely.

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          • Queen bed Asked on February 2, 2020 in Question of the Day.

              I can’t speak for myself but a friend told me in confidence that he gets turned on by women wearing glasses.

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              • 2 votes
            • Queen bed Asked on February 2, 2020 in Oral Sex.

                I absolutely, unreservedly love the sight, smell, taste and feel of DW’s vulva. Even after nearly 30 years of being together, I find it amazing. Sometimes when I look at it or play with it I say to her “I can’t believe two babies have come out here!” (She laughs when I tell her.) And I mean it. I like the gentle curving shape of her labia, the little button of her clitoris, the feel of her opening on my tongue, the small bit of ridginess inside, the musty, erotic smell, the slipperiness of her natural lubrication. As she is not normally able to have an orgasm by PIV alone, it’s also a way for me to pleasure her.
                I will never forget the first time she let me touch her vulva while when we were dating. She let me rest my finger on it for a little while and I wanted to preserve the smell on it for as long as I could.

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              • Queen bed Asked on January 31, 2020 in Other (Other non-sexual marriage issues.).

                  Does this happen to other couples? Absolutely. We all have blind spots and we are all prone to finding fault with others. What you are describing is not all all unusual. And not only in marriage but in other family relationships too.
                  Yes, it happens to us sometimes. DW can be obstinate and dismissive of particular problems with her behavior and I’m sure I do the same to her from time to time. This can create a bad atmosphere and a sense of misunderstanding, even hostility.
                  What can be done about it? I don’t know. We usually weather it out; normally after a few days we just move on. I think we have to accept that in some aspects of life we will sometimes irritate each other. We have been together for almost 30 years, so clearly even when it happens, it passes. I think we both kind of know that it will pass and just blend in the overall fabric of our relationship.

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                • Queen bed Asked on January 15, 2020 in Question of the Day.

                    The best sex we have ever had was during the months when DW was heavily pregnant with our son. We always had a very satisfactory sex live but the pregnancy did something special for us. To start with, for me, the look of my heavily pregnant wife was a real turn on. For DW, something happened around in the third trimester of her pregnancy and her hormones went wild. One extremely erotic effect of this was that she became very aroused and the nature of her orgasms changed. Rather than the normal short but intensive burst, she tended to have long, deep, extended orgasms, with me not so much thrusting inside her but slowly pushing in and pulling out. So we had these long rear-entry lovemaking sessions with her kneeling on the floor, leaning against the couch, bum slightly raised and me moving in and out of her.

                    This was also very visually erotic because another unusual thing that happened was that the amount and consistency of her vaginal fluids changed quite astonishingly into something like sun cream / yogurt. So every time I pulled out, my P was literally covered with a thick layer of white cream. I absolutely loved the feeling and the sight of it. We spent many happy evenings making love like this.

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