5/26/2020 – Today’s Question Of The Day
Well, there was the 6th grade sex education classes with their expatiation and illustrations of how cattle get it done. But unfortunately my sex education first came through the neighborhood kids inappropriate, incomplete, and purely immoral oriented education. I could add to that the National Geographic magazines at school and the Sears add in the newspaper every Sunday.
I knew there was something secretive from maybe grade 6 on. I tried to learn from encyclopedias and anything I could, but they weren’t too descriptive and besides, the most important pages were torn out. Nothing was ever talked about. I only learned what the actual sex act was, somewhere in my teens. That was strictly from books.
Others mentioned the National Geographic. That magazine wasn’t even allowed in our house.
Just by exploring my own body.
The earliest memories of my life is on exploring my own body, maybe I was 3 yo or so. I’ve been always attracted to sex and the mechanics of my own body, it always wondered me, the things I’ve done to my poor body, ouch.
But strangely enough, I explored sex with other person just inside marriage, I waited for that.
So self-pleasure before marriage, and then the whole married sex thing.
I also don’t remember a time when I did not know about sex. I was given the clinical explanation well before third grade. I knew where babies came from and for a while only wondered how the daddy stuff got IN the mommy. (I pictured some sort of metaphysical *jump* as they lay there side by side.) It was still early elementary that I knew about PIV, though; well before that fifth grade unit that basically only told us to go to the nurse if our period started. That was just the sanctioned information from my mom, who wanted me to know more than she had been told. I also had a friend who was three years older than me and an older cousin who both had more than enough information and were happy to share. I remember being five when a boy at the babysitter told me the middle finger was a bad finger, and I understood it had something to do with that stuff that had to do with baby making, but I couldn’t figure out what.
I have often wished over the years that I had not known about it quite so early.
My eureka moment came in the 6th grade. Although my mother explained the physiology of sex in well-thought bits and pieces to her nearly dozen kids from the time we were 5/6 years old, it didn’t sink-in until I was 11-12 years old. What led up to that eureka moment was a combination of kids asking about anatomical terms at recess, one day, and my physical tendency to get an erection when I least wanted one! I remember pouring over a dictionary to look up: penis, vagina, breasts, etc. Then it all clicked! I realized what my wet dreams we’re all about, why girls in my class started to blossom, etc. I remember it was all good, perhaps because my mother was sex positive. I am grateful for a healthy, respectful understanding of sex then and now.
I don’t remember exactly when and how I learned about it.
Visits to the farm were a major source of info as reproduction was talked about and on display regularly! Around age 9, I recall the guys in my class at school talking about a girl in a higher grade that got pregnant and how that came about. I remember in 5th grade a girl in 6th grade must have liked me. She was eager to share with me stuff that her older sister was telling her. I think encyclopedia and Reader’s Digest also played a role.
My dad had the conversation with me when I was in 5th grade. Unbeknownst to me, my grade school had a meeting with the 5th grade girls to discuss sex and the changes that were occurring in their bodies related to the start of their menstrual cycle. Most of us boys had no clue what was going on, except we got extra time on the playground that day. Subsequent to that talk, the girls seemed to be huddling together more than usual, clearly chatting about their ‘special’ meeting. I remember the next day was rainy, and during our playground time a group of girls came up to me and asked me if I was wearing my ‘rubbers’ (rubber booties that fit over your shoes to keep them from getting wet). I said ‘yes’ and they went away laughing hysterically. I had no clue at all what was so funny.
My school sent a letter to the parents of boys asking them to give us ‘the sex talk’ if they had not already done so. I had no real interest in girls at the time, and when my dad told me ‘the facts of life’ I remember thinking ‘that is very weird, why would anyone want to do that’. It wasn’t until the end of the 5th grade that I started to take an interest in girls, and by the time I was in 6th grade I had my first crush and was interested in learning all that I could about sex.
My grandmother also played a minor role in my sex education, though we never discussed the topic. She was a nurse and when visiting her house I would occasionally look through her nursing text books. After I began to take an interest in girls , those books became an excellent resource to learn about the female reproductive anatomy, though as you can imagine, the information was very clinical. But I did learn all the correct names for all the bits!