Awkward question: Dreams: sex with a colleague.
Sorry if this question has been already posted here at some point.
Any experiences about dreams where you have sex with a colleague?
I mean actual dream, not “wishing” to have sex with a colleague or fantasizing. It happened to me a couple of times, out of the blue, with two different female colleagues.
To be 100% honest, I have never NEVER fantasized about having sex with these colleagues, and even after I had such a dream, I don’t really lust or fantasize with these ladies.
It is UN-avoidable not to remember the dreams when I sometimes see these ladies (again, I don’t lust when I see them at work), it is very awkward.
Any experiences, stories, thoughts?
@ShadowSpirit, with all my husband’s testosterone issues and study on it…. yes, multiple erections throughout the night is common and healthy. That is the way for the body to restore the penis and keep it healthy. (Men, if you aren’t getting nightly erections, it’s a sign of something being off…. low T, sleep apnea, etc.)
To the OP, I have not had per se sexual dreams with another, but relational dreams with a sexual undertone. I am usually bothered by it when I wake, especially when it seems so far out of the blue.. And what I have learned to do is take my thoughts captive and turn it over through prayer.
This is something that happens to me more often than I’d like. It used to bother me, but I came to realize that I don’t have control over what I dream. I can sometimes recognize and stop a dream from continuing, but not always. And that’s a rare skill.
Think of it as human nature. It will only control you if you let it. When it happens to me, I send up a prayer, reminding myself of Whose child I am, and then I turn toward my husband. When I see that colleague, I remind myself that they don’t even know, and I immediately think of my husband. After a while, it stopped bothering me. It’s at the point now where I don’t always even think of it when I see them.
My dreams tend to be my subconscious going through different recent experiences. The juxtaposition doesn’t necessarily mean anything. Once, I had a dream that I was cooking a person in a big cauldron over a campfire. It was so disturbing to me, I went to see the school psychologist. He assured me that it was probably just my subconscious processing things that had happened to me recently. I remembered that the previous day, while I was in the kitchen cooking chili, I briefly overheard that my husband was in the other room watching Silence of the Lambs. Even though I didn’t listen or watch with him, my brain put those things together in a dream.
There are also times when I have dreams that reflect a subconscious knowledge of what is happening to my body IRL. I have a medical condition that causes episodes of painful, involuntary muscle spasms that cause sustained abnormal postures. One night, I had a dream that a man broke into my hotel room, grabbed my ankles, and squeezed them until they hurt. I woke up to realize my feet and ankles were locked in a painful spasm. If I go to bed nude, I will dream that I am naked in public, because I am subconsciously aware of my state of dress while I’m having dreams that occur in the setting of my workplace, church, or social settings.
Paul Byerly educated me on TheXYCode that men always get erections while dreaming, regardless of the dream or whether or not it’s a sexual dream. It’s just something that physiologically happens to a male during that sleep stage. You could be dreaming about a co-worker simply because you have interacted with her recently, and you are subconsciously aware of having an erection, and your subconscious mind puts those two things together in the dream since there is an awareness of the two happening at the same time.
If you have no inclinations toward these women in real life, please relax, and realize it was just a dream and probably doesn’t mean anything at all.
I used to dream about sex with a neighbor man. The interesting thing is, I would stop it just before going all the way, because I didn’t want to hurt my husband. I haven’t dreamed them for years and don’t recall that I ever though of it in his presence. At that point, he was an ungodly man and I would have never thought of having sex with him in real life.
DH and I share any sexual dreams with each other. I also would agree not to make a thing out of it, unless you start dreaming about the same person over and over. (I once read if you dream the same dream more than once a month, you maybe have some things to look at and deal with.)
The thing about the erections may be an explanation. In my case I have them almost every night, regardless of dreams having sexual content or not, it could be because of my sex drive that is always high.
I actually have a good work-relationship with this lady, maybe as you explain my subconscious has made up a link or story while sleeping…
DWinOK ….. just about every dude has multiple erections through out the night (regardless as to dreaming about sex or anything else) When being worked up by doc for infertility, some docs will have their patients wear a device that measures number, duration and degree of erections through out a night. You may have heard of the off color terms like ” morning wood, morning monster etc” …. those are b/c most teens and men wake up with erections most mornings….. aka – human physiology
I have only had these kind of dreams as a teen and had a wet dream a couple of times with them. I wouldn’t put any importance on them. We are fallen creatures and in the dream world we can be open to anything. I always enjoyed the dreams but unlike you didn’t connect them up with anyone I knew. I would let it pass and wouldn’t analyse them too much unless it keeps happening.
I’m not an expert in dream interpretation, but I do believe that dreams can often be a symbol of something completely different, so should not be taken literally. In other words, your dream doesn’t mean you are attracted to these women or have any desire to be in an adulterous relationship. It’s possible that it has to do with your work relationship, such as seniority over them or the need to have them on your side for a specific project.