If you have been caught masturbating (any age), who caught you and how was it handled? If you caught your child/spouse MBing, how would you respond?

    Views on masturbation vary widely. For some folks it’s a perfectly natural act and encouraged or celebrated. One the other hand, it is consider taboo and guilt producing.

    What has been and is your experience and viewpoint on masturbation?

    I noticed that my second question was cut-off.  It should read . . .

    If you caught your child or spouse masturbating, how would you respond?

    [Perhaps the Admin can fix the original Question.]

    on May 30, 2019.

    Oldbear,  because I have enough points, I can go in and edit questions. (Which is an issue for me, but I might as well use it for good 🙂 )  I went in and took away the word “ever” in the first question, and I took out “or” and replaced it with an “/” and abbreviated the second masturbating to “MBing”.  There is a 150 character limit, and that is why your question was cut off.  Check out the edits and see if it gets across the heart, if it doesn’t I can go back and change it to whatever you want. Holding up my right hand:  I promise to never use this power without the knowledge or consent of any poster.

    on May 30, 2019.

    Early in our marriage (now married 29 yrs) mrs livver caught me (I was trying to take care of business during her time of the month) Herrepky – please tell me and take care of yourself in front of me)    From that day forward we have always admired waTching each other masterbate ….. bottom line : embrace it

    on June 5, 2019.
    Add Comment
    14 Answer(s)

      I have had my husband walk in on me…. usually he handles it by taking his clothes off and jumping in bed with me.

      I have never “caught” my boys, but I pretty much know what is happening when they are locked in the bathroom for a long time, either in the shower or pretending to be in the shower.  There have been times I have knocked on the door and told them to hurry up (for practical reasons). But we have taken this as a cue for my husband to take them out, one on one, and have a talk with them about what is normal for their bodies and minds, and how to handle it in a godly way (which is not by saying “don’t masturbate.”)

      For my daughter, when she was a pre-teen (10 or 11), she was playing with a stuffed animal. I don’t know for sure what happened, I know she was rubbing her body on it, and she ended up having an orgasm.  She did not know what it was, it scared her, and she came to me and told me about it.  I tried to reassure her she was okay, and tried to explain her body and God’s purpose for that feel good feeling.  A year or so later, in our time we take for each kid to teach purity, we talked more about masturbation.  I also have encouraged her to take a mirror and learn her body.  I have come to see the good (rather than just feel the guilt) in a woman knowing her own body and how it can respond and how to make it respond so that it is one less sexual issue to have once she is married.

      Under the stars Answered on May 30, 2019.

      Have to say your experiences and how u handled it are to be  admired and should be utilized for our youth! Sexually:   we all need it and need to explore as an adolescent.  Yes you (or we) might have been ” caught” by hubby (or spouse) – but u and  we all know he loved it (and watched it/you)…… your boys or daughter: yes sooner or later they all will partake (as we all did) in self pleasuring, and your ability to teach them real, normal and appropriate sexuality is VERY impressive- keep up (pardon the pun) the good work.  Society and your children will thank you in years to come!!!  We all enjoyed  it when growing up, the TRUE TEST is enjoying it as a married couple in front of each other … other thoughts??

      on June 5, 2019.
      Add Comment

        In my early teens, I discovered the pleasure of masturbation. The realization of its relatedness to wet dreams (less masturbation made for more wet dreams) helped me comfortably accept the act of self pleasure as ok. Although my mother never mentioned finding my wet dream soaked underwear, I knew that she certainly understood what was happening and that she considered it quite normal. My wonderfully devout, Christian mother was very open about discussing the facts of life with her children in a very positive manner,  so it was almost intuitive that masturbation was a natural and acceptable thing to do.

        Before we were married, Mrs. Youngbear and I were quite intimate (short of losing our virginity with each other). We pushed the boundaries (unfortunately), so we knew that each other solo masturbated to take the edge off our horniness. However, we hadn’t sorted out our comfort with it. Early in our marriage, I was taking care of myself (never to the detriment of coming together) with the bathroom door closed (not locked) when Mrs. Youngbear opened the door as I was at the PONR. The moment of surprise caught both of us off guard and we  mumbled apologetically – her for walking in on me and me for being caught in the act. Within the hour, I opened the conversation about what had happened and she smiled lovingly and said, “We know we masturbate and it’s just fine!”

        From that point on, our masturbation – solo, mutual, sharing about our self-pleasure, encouraging each other to self-pleasure, and asking to watch and/or help out – has been a wonderful, intimate activity in our marriage bed.

        Our children heard and learned from us that sex was good. God intended it to knit a man and wife together intimately and for the creation of family. He also intended it for pleasure, including masturbation.

        On the floor Answered on May 30, 2019.
        Add Comment

          I encourage my wife to MB. She mainly does it when I’m away from home or at work so there is a slim chance of catching her in the act. No big thing if I did as we occasionally MB together anyway.

          I’ve never been caught doing it either but I guess it could still happen!

          Fell out of ... Answered on May 30, 2019.
          Add Comment

            My dad caught me once when I was a teenager.  He was cool about it and  didn’t make a a big deal about it.  However, I was taught at church youth groups that it was very sinful.  My dad, however, reassured me that it was a natural part of being a man.  He helped me to understand that the guilt was not from God. This was an awesome thing that my Godly dad taught me.  When I married, both my wife and I were pure.  Some of the reason for that purity was the fact that I could masturbate to relieve the sexual tension and thereby behave myself with my best friend.  My wife and I have been married for 38 years. We were busy raising 6 kids and she was fine with the fact that I would from time to time masturbate in the shower to release the sexual tension.  It’s tough to have sex everyday with a large growing family. Now, as empty nesters she allows me full access to her and and there is no need to masturbate. Although we do enjoy mutual masturbation at least once a week.  As far as our kids are concerned, I taught the boys what my father taught me.  My wife taught the girls.  We spoke of sex freely with our kids and they all married Godly Christians and all have happy marriages.  2 of my sons are pastors and have thanked me for the things about masturbation that I taught them.  Sadly, the church has missed the boat in the area and has instilled a lot of guilt in an area that can be used for freedom and victory.

            Queen bed Answered on May 30, 2019.
            Add Comment

              I know I said I was out of here but today is a new day. Wife and I are making forward steps and sometimes I get discouraged but at the end of the day God is good.

              First time I was caught, I was a teenager when my dad walked in my room after I got out of the shower. I covered up like lightning. My dad didn’t say anything. My wife caught me a few times years ago but I always hoped she would so I don’t know if it counts when you are trying to get caught.

              California King Answered on May 30, 2019.

              It’s good to see you around. It put a smile on my face. 🙂

              on June 1, 2019.

              Thanks SC

              on June 4, 2019.
              Add Comment

                Great question- we have been married 30 yrs (Mrs Liverr typing)   In our marriage, we have,  after a few years of developing our sexuality together, enjoyed mutual masterbation in front of each other – it’s usually a taboo subject – so we have always felt doing that only deepens and builds our love,trust and passion for each other.  At same time, I know his libido is way higher than mine .. I have always suggested and promoted him masturbating when he needs to release: I’m  ok with him masturbating next to me in bed or in shower ( in shower is easier clean up for him .. lol)  but I do have to say it’s a real turn on for me to watch him and hear him and feel our bed shake as he completes the mission!

                Queen bed Answered on May 31, 2019.
                Add Comment

                  I bought an egg vibrator for my DW once. after I used it on her, she told me we needed to limit it’s used because she was afraid she’d get addicted to it and use it while I’m not around. obviously in her eyes solo MB is taboo. I wish I could convince her that I’d be OK with her taking care of herself while I’m on travel or deployment. She wouldn’t approve of me taking care of myself either when she’s not around.

                  On the floor Answered on May 30, 2019.

                  Masturbation is a great way to learn about yourself.  Just ask her to promise to share with you all see discovers.

                  on May 30, 2019.

                  She was taught very early on that MB is wrong…I don’t think this will be something I can change overnight…

                  on May 30, 2019.
                  Add Comment

                    I have never been caught, nor have I caught anyone doing it.

                    It seems to me that if it involves porn or lust, it is sinful. Also, if it becomes addictive, it is wrong. And if it limits one from being  able to fully engage in meaningful intimacy with one’s spouse, it is counter productive. I would suggest that in each of these situations it becomes destructive. It’s occurrence within marriage should be a matter of discussion, mutual agreement and understanding.

                    Under the stars Answered on May 30, 2019.
                    Add Comment

                      I have not been caught and I try not to do it. I come from a Christian background where we are admonished not to engage in that. Doing it together as a couple could be part of foreplay. I have been trying to observe if DW does it. I would want to learn from how she does it, but she won’t do it.

                      Queen bed Answered on May 30, 2019.
                      Add Comment

                        I haven’t been caught or caught my wife, but I have seriously given thought to calling her into the room when I’m buck naked and start masturbating in front of her mid-morning some Saturday just to make the point that she is much too modest and inhibited…  during foreplay she will let me finger her and seems to enjoy it but isn’t really a participant, and I will ask her to give me a hand-job which she does half-heartedly if at all.  She had a UTI several years ago and ML was off limits for a week or 10 days and gave me HJs then until the infection cleared up and we could go back to “vanilla” sex.

                        Hammock Answered on May 30, 2019.
                        Add Comment

                        Your Answer

                        By posting your answer, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.