Men, did you do this in the delivery room?

    This isn’t about sex exactly, but rather about the results of it… childbirth.

    For those men who accompanied their wives in the delivery room, did you experience this?  Right after the baby was born, the nurse or doctor takes the baby and puts him and her in the incubator, puts drops in the eyes, etc.  I’m over there with the baby, counting fingers and toes and talking to the baby, and my wife says something like, ‘Can you come over here with me’, wanting me to hold her hand while she pushes the placenta out.

    I don’t mean to be insensitive, but the new baby is a lot more exciting than holding her hand to push out the afterbirth.  I went back for her.

    I’d imagine that scenario goes on in most deliver rooms where the father is present unless the wife doesn’t care if her husband is there for the last bit of the ordeal with the placenta.

    Btw, I saw a bit of a TV show where a woman drops into a neighbor’s house and gives birth on the couch, and they just skipped over that placenta part.  They showed a clean two-month-old and she didn’t have to give birth at all.  And he says to get hot water and towels.  If it were me, I’d go get a tarp or two to put on that sofa.

    California King Asked 7 days ago in Children.
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      I was there for my wife to support and be there for her. After we lost our daughter (with both pregnancies being high risk), I wanted to give DW as much support as possible…and in more ways than one!

      With our son at one point, the doctor needed someone to grab DW’s leg so DW had more leverage while pushing. So I was holding her right leg and pushing back against her with one arm and holding her hand with my other hand while she was pushing son out. I looked down there while his head was starting to come through,  cut the cord, saw the placenta come out, and everything.

      Thankfully, one of the nurses we had worked with when we lost our daughter was there while she was off duty and was kind enough to grab my phone and get plenty of pics of our newborn son right after he came out as well as a video of his first few minutes.

      Usually, things like that would make me squeamish (just the threat of possibly having my blood drawn will cause me to feel light headed), but I handled it quite well. I was there to support my wife and our new son in every way I could and could not wait to wrap my arms around both of them.

       

       

      California King Answered 6 days ago.
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        That didn’t happen in our birthing rooms, for any of the 4 births. I don’t recall asking my husband for anything for myself during the delivery. And after the baby was born, I wanted him getting pictures.

        Under the stars Answered 7 days ago.
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          For all our babies’ births, the doctor immediately laid the baby on my chest. So, DH was right there with me and I hardly noticed the passing of the placenta, other then them telling me to push.

          Under the stars Answered 7 days ago.

          At our hospital, they were pushing “skin on skin” contact for mother and baby, so our experience is very similar to yours.

          6 days ago.
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            Female here (and have given birth a few times).
            I just wanted to say that I would be more interested in the new baby, too – so don’t feel bad. 😀

            Best way is to have the baby straight onto the mother’s chest, and both mother and father can be doting over the new baby while the placenta exits.

            California King Answered 7 days ago.
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              Agree with the ladies here so far…babies ended up on the chest first for all four of ours. I played support and took pictures.

              Fun side note: I got the privilege of announcing the sex for all of ours (we chose to not find out sex beforehand).

              -Scott

              Under the stars Answered 7 days ago.

              Reminds of the time the doctor held up our newly delivered baby and said ‘boy or girl, dad?’ to my DH. He was quiet for a long time before tentatively saying, ‘is it a girl?’ Lol I ribbed him about that for a long time.

              6 days ago.
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                I agree with the ‘baby on the mother’s chest’ notion. It’s gained momentum as skin-to-skin has been proven to be so beneficial, also women’s health advocates are making waves. I’ve had some homebirths (intentionally)— the preparation, care, and planning is extensive. We had no casualties mess-wise. Even had my water break while in a car, but mitigated that easily.
                My DH must be the exception to the rule as he cares about baby, but I remember him being very sensitive to be there for the afterbirth, without me asking him to be. 💜

                California King Answered 7 days ago.
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                  Our babies were born in the tub at a birthing center. I caught them both, and got to hold them first (for a moment) before DW did. Such special moments! Of course, she’d already carried them around for 9 months, so she still wins.

                  Blanket on a secluded beach! Answered 7 days ago.
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                    Times have changed!  I was with DW for about 3 hrs while she labored  but was not allowed in the delivery room for the actual birth of our oldest (who is 41 now)… they wheeled DW out with our son on her chest, tightly swaddled.  I gave them both a kiss and the nurse took the baby and I watched her wash him up through the window, while DW was taken to her room where she stayed the rest of the night and the day before being discharged late afternoon.  I was allowed in the delivery room for our 2nd (he’s 39 now) but was told to stand up by her head and hold her hand.  So I saw our son born (kinda)…. and watched the nurse wash him up in the delivery room while they attended to DW.  Ditto for our 3rd son except they tied DW’s tubes after she delivered – I wasn’t in there for that.   I knew what was happening but didn’t witness the afterbirth in any of the three.  It was 3 different docs /hospitals in three different cities  (1979 thru 1983) but pretty much the SOP for all of them.

                    On the floor Answered 6 days ago.
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                      Two of our  babies went on my DW’s chest after birth. My oldest son went to NICU because his temp was a bit low, and I was asked by my DW to go with him. He was perfectly fine; the NICU doctors didn’t think his temp was actually that abnormal.

                      This may be for a different question, but how many DH’s were at the end with all the action? I am very medically squeamish so I avoided seeing the actual births. I was also offered the chance to cut my the umbilical cord when my daughter was born, but passed. (Not ‘passed out’, but I was close!)

                      Blanket on a secluded beach! Answered 6 days ago.

                      My DH’s siblings thought he would never last in the delivery room, since he is very squeamish about any blood and injury. He was there with me for every baby, start to finish. I asked him if it didn’t bother him. He said ‘no, because it’s natural!’ An injury isn’t.

                      6 days ago.
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                        You’re kidding, right?  I have fainted before from a finger prick.  I was not about to cause another emergency.  So, I was there throughout labor but all the nurses knew that I would have to leave close to the actual birth.  And, the placenta part, there was no way!!  My experience was similar to @JLoydH where I went somewhere else with the baby while they weighed the baby, took blood from the heel, cleaned the baby, etc.  I do think it is ridiculous how soon they make mothers depart from the hospital.  I can guarantee that if it were men giving birth, the norm would be increased to four or five days of a normal delivery.  We should take better care of the mothers!!  Off my soap box for the day….

                        Queen bed Answered 6 days ago.

                        We were in the hospital for 48 hours after the birth that was becoming the norm for all insurances and was put into code. My wife said that was more than enough time because most of the other follow up could be done from home and with the weekly visits with the doctor.

                        Now many women I know do not even go to the hospital and do home births with midwives – no doctor and hospital unless there is a medical issue or there were complications in previous births.

                        However in this day of COVID most are being sent home within 24 hours with bed rest for another 24. Keep health people home to save room space for sick people. My sister in law just experienced that this summer with the birth of her 3rd.

                        6 days ago.

                        Sorry, but I don’t agree.  Think about what has just happened.  This is major, this is an incredible feat of women everywhere.  I’d like to see them cared for, waited on, get some sleep before they are thrown into what awaits them at home.

                        6 days ago.

                        I’m sure I’m not the only mom who rests better at home. I don’t sleep well in the hospital and I prefer to have full care of my own baby. The only reason I would have for staying in hospital is that almost all our babies have had a bad choking spell on mucus from birth. Bad enough that a couple started turning blue and the nurse had to call for help. That happened at 24 to 48 hrs of age, so that is the reason I never talked them into letting me go home sooner. One time is too much, when you stand there, helplessly watching them work on your precious baby. And wondering what would have happened had you signed yourself out and were at home an hour from the hospital. For myself, I would have liked to get up from the delivery bed and go home immediately.

                        6 days ago.
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