No longer Pre-Orgasmic
I once read somewhere that there is no such thing as “non-orgasmic”, only “pre-orgasmic”. As in, if you’ve never had an orgasm, you will.
I posted a month ago asking help for my arousal issues, and that I’ve never had an orgasm after two years of marriage. The other night, my discouragement interrupted sex. My husband went to the living room and read and prayed for me. He was absolutely hopeless, as I was. The next day, he was at work. I was thinking, reading, praying. I thought to myself, why not? What have I got to lose? I pulled out the vibrator, which I have never used on myself. It’s a bullet style but has a ring for him to wear, and that’s the only way we’ve ever used it. I really didn’t like it before, so I had no reason to think I would then. I was in no way aroused or “horny”. I was just tired and it was one of the only options I had left. I tried it and it worked!! In about 3 minutes, I had the lightest, softest orgasm. I was absolutely astonished. I didn’t know what to think of it. I was anxious to tell my husband & He felt the same way I did! It worked out later when he was home that my mom had our baby. He asked me if I could do it again while he held me. I was very self conscious, so instead of three minutes, it took an hour. Which resulted in a much more intense one. He was more excited than I was!! He thought it was the sexiest thing ever and he wants me to keep doing it even when he’s not around so I can get comfortable with it and we can build on it.
I always asked God why He was keeping it from me. Now I have to wonder if it was just for our lack of trying and our ignorance. Whatever the case, I am so happy to know I CAN do it! I just wanted to thank God on here… I can’t necessarily give a testimony about it on Wednesday night 😉 also thanks to those of you who prayed for us 🙂
Great news! Sometimes it is our own inhibitions holding us back. May you two continue to experiment, grow, and learn together!
Maybe the next step should be to allow your husband to hold the vibrator as you guide him with your hands and words. Give him the power to know how to bring you pleasure.
That is incredible! Thanks for sharing. This is an answer to prayer and will be the doorway for many enjoyable times for you two!!
Don’t forget that many others out there are going through similar times as you – waiting much longer than you did. Likely you will have opportunities to discreetly help them and enable them to live hopeful and enjoyable lives!
This is totally uplifting. My wife was the same in our early marrige days. It is hard for him too….i felt a failure. I am now 37 and almost 15 years married with 3 kids and it is a surprise to not make her orgasm now! PM if you want to hear more.
Thanks for posting your story. Sounds like you guys succeeded for the first time within a couple weeks of when we did. Difference was that we’d been married 12 yr! Oh, and DW knew at least a bit what it felt like since she O’d in her sleep when pregnant.
I assume at this point you’ve tried all sorts of stuff with the vibe, but in case you haven’t tried it, I strongly suggest PIV+vibe. This is what first got us there and is what we do every time (a few times we haven’t finished her that way, but it’s always done the heavy lifting). I know PIV+vibe doesn’t work for everyone though, but still worth a shot!