QOTD – 4/06/20 – Do you still make out with your spouse?

    According to Wikipedia “making out” refers to, “kissing, including heavy kissing of the neck, … prolonged, passionate, open-mouth kissing (also known as French kissing), intimate skin-to-skin contact, or to non-penetrative sex acts such as heavy petting.”

    Is making out still a part of your love life with your spouse? If not, why has this form of lovemaking left your MB?

    On the floor Asked on April 5, 2020 in Question of the Day.
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    23 Answer(s)

      DW and I had let making out fall by the wayside in the last few years but recently we have been doing a better job of bringing it back. Making out like a couple of horny teenagers is extremely satisfying as a married couple. When my wife really gets things going she can make me O from the kissing alone. 🙂

      On the floor Answered on April 5, 2020.
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        DW and I always engage in prolonged skin to skin contact when we make love. The amount of open-mouth kissing tends to vary from time to time; on some occasions one or the other of us may feel our breath is icky and don’t want to take the time to brush our teeth. Outside of the bedroom we don’t do much making out. For now, with all the kids home that would be difficult to do without one of them ‘getting grossed out’. But I think it would be fun to bring making out outside of the bedroom once we are alone again.

        On the floor Answered on April 6, 2020.
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          Not much. I have to put a lot of this on me. I really have to be in a good place emotionally with my husband AND in life in general. I also can’t have been over-stimulated by people (including my own family), because as an introvert, or maybe a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person), when I am, I have to block input to senses, and my face is the first place because it’s the most sensitive, for obvious reasons. Living in a household of 6-8 people, it’s easy to be “over-stimulated”.

          Under the stars Answered on April 6, 2020.

          It can’t be easy to discuss things like this so I really appreciate that you do. Many would simply pretend behind the veil of “I’m okay” instead of admit to challenge. I’m also very introverted and this over stimulation, even among close relatives, causes massive and immediate mood swings for me (fight or flight I guess, and both are displayed as anger for me). I understand where you wouldn’t want the close contact, but do you have other coping mechanisms that work…if it isn’t too personal to share?

          on April 6, 2020.

          I don’t mind sharing, but I might need a little more direction of what specifically you are talking about, or I could really go in a direction you weren’t intending.

          Are you talking about coping mechanisms in general, or specifically with my husband and how to work with it in regards to intimacy?

          on April 6, 2020.

          Specifically, I was wondering about coping in general with the over stimulation from being around too many people. This may not be the place, but I just got to thinking about how my reaction is to retreat in grumpiness and I’d love to find ways not to do that.

          on April 6, 2020.

          I sent you some PMs because I replied at length 😳 🙂

          on April 7, 2020.
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            Every chance we get. I wouldn’t say “petting” is part of every make out session, but we do enjoy a passionate kiss frequently. Part of it may be that we have spent so much time apart over the last 13 years, so we tend to relish our moments together. Part of it is a great opportunity to embarrass our kids. Part of it is simply that she is the most beautiful and enticing person I’ve ever known. So, I’ve spent as much of the past 20 years as physically close to her as I can get.

            California King Answered on April 6, 2020.

            Our circumstances can definitely make a difference and influence us!  It’s good that those are your experiences when you come back together!

            on April 6, 2020.
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              I think couples forget about it because it was something that was OK prior to marriage but a 2nd class act compared to PIV, OS, MS, etc so couples stop kissing & romancing once they move on to other permissible marriage activities…and in turn lose some of the spark and magic that occurred outside the bedroom first.

              Under the stars Answered on April 6, 2020.
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                We do! Hugs and passionate kisses happen regularly. Touching, skin to skin, etc. too. When we have sex, I love the physical connection as well.

                Under the stars Answered on April 6, 2020.
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                  Yes! We recently brought back making out. Last summer I told my wife that I can handle and even enjoy some making out, teasing, etc. that doesn’t lead to sex immediately. She was surprised and skeptical, but I’ve shown her that I’m serious. Physical touch is top of my love languages, and I helped her see that doesn’t have to just be sex. In fact, my feeling of need for sex has been lessened a bit by the increase in making out and other physical touch. Don’t get me wrong, I still want regular, frequent sex, but I’m not as frustrated and I don’t feel nearly as unfulfilled between encounters when other activity like making out is happening.

                  On the floor Answered on April 6, 2020.
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                    We haven’t for years. To be honest, it’s difficult to kiss him. He often doesn’t let me come up for air, and I don’t enjoy the struggle.

                    Once, he told me that making out doesn’t work for us because it always leads to sex. I don’t view that as a bad thing, so his comment disappointed me. I backed off after that.

                    Blanket on a secluded beach! Answered on April 6, 2020.

                    Wow, DG. Sorry to hear that. That’d be fine by me.

                    on April 6, 2020.
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                      Just to be doing it, no.
                      Before and during LM, every single time, even quickies.

                      California King Answered on April 6, 2020.
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                        Yes we do! We kiss long and passionate sometimes, both knowing it is not leading to sex, but just enjoy the kissing, hugging etc. We both like it.

                        Fell out of ... Answered on April 6, 2020.
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