QOTD-6/1/2020- Most meaningful thing?
- She prays for me. Every day she texts me a Scripture and a prayer. It demonstrates to me two things, her love for me and her continued devotion and relationship with Jesus. It means so much to me because in my previous marriage, my ex walked away from our near 17 yr marriage and 19 yrs of ministry together, making choices against her faith and upbringing. My DW prays for me this way and she prays when we pray together as a couple for various needs.
- She is generous sexually, even when she is tired or wiped out hormonally.
- She has forgiven me when I’ve acted like the back end of a donkey and “step on her air hose”.
The most? That is difficult. But here are a few of them!
Similar to Olorin, making her vows to me when we married.
Also, remaining faithfully married to me all of these decades.
Being committed to me as my lover and making sure my sexual needs are being met.
Praying for me and supporting me in my career.
Having and raising our kids.
Along with a lot of the stuff mentioned, there are 2 times that stand out. One time, pregnant and severely nauseated, hungry, and on the road driving, we stopped at a gas station. When DH came out after paying for the gas, he brought me a hot piece of pizza. It wasn’t like him at that point, and it hit the spot perfectly!!
The other time was more recently. He came home from town, carrying a huge box into the house. Very pleased, he set it down in front of me and said he had been eyeing these for awhile and they always reminded him of me. He just hadn’t ever had room to bring it home. It was a beautiful flower planter. He had spent quite a bit on it, but it was important to him to make sure he got one for me!
The most meaningful thing she has ever done for me is marry me so we could live life as one. Such utter and complete acceptance of this broken man is shocking and humbling. Marrying me also led to many things, including her giving her sexuality to me, having children with me, forgiving my porn problems, completely merging our finances, etc.
The most meaningful thing is that she has never given up on me. We struggled through several years of me not being the man I promised to be when we married, not being engaged in church activity, and withdrawing from even family activities. Though she told me years later that she had been almost to her breaking point, it always meant so much to me that she lovingly kept inviting and pleading with me, and it was that love that brought me out of the funk. I knew I was in the wrong and it amazed me that she stuck by me, hoping and praying. She’s told me that she kept telling herself she was getting us both to heaven, even if she had to drag me kicking and screaming.
Another very meaningful thing was said recently. I’ve posted about it several times, but, for clarity, I’ll repeat myself a bit. We currently live apart due to my work in the oil field of West Texas and our desire to have her and the kids closer to family and small town life in the mountains. Anyway, recently DW had an idea for a family picture, but I was unable to get home because of the ‘rona situation. Without any malice, she innocently suggested I have a good friend of ours here take my picture and she would then “photoshop” me into the family picture. In that moment I realized that I am willing to give up the pay and benefits the oil field has always given me, to be home with my family. I do not want to be a photoshop dad and husband any longer. Now, it hasn’t happened yet, but things are in motion.
Without a doubt, the most meaningful thing to me in our life together was her standing by me when a heart condition almost took my life. She was in that hospital room every day, and she held my hand and kept me going through the darkest night of my life when the pain was so excruciating I told her I wanted to die–and she knew her always optimistic husband meant it! Not only that, but she continued to be an awesome mom to our two boys (who were teenagers at the time), and even managed to keep her job going too! Not to mention having to go back to the hospital with me and hold my hand again when they jabbed a needle in my back to drain out the built-up fluid–twice!!!
In a word, intimacy.
DW has let me know her deeply in every sense, emotionally, spiritually, physically. She seeks to know me in each of these ways too. We are vulnerable with each other, and that can only come with deep trust and love. That’s true intimacy, and DW has opened up to me and let me truly know her.