Resources for the “larger than average” groom or married man?
Based on discussions I’ve had on this board in the past and elsewhere online and IRL, I’ve been wondering if there a need to provide some resources/help for the virgin groom and/or married man who happens to be “larger than average” in penis size.
I know prior to our marriage, I could have used some specific counsel that would have helped bring guidance and encouragement to both me and my bride. And my wife and I have counseled other couples in the same situation and were able to help them.
I’ve asked a few others, and have gotten answers ranging from “absolutely, this is a need” to “thanks, but we kind of figured out the hurdles and adjustments ourselves.”
I’ve considered even starting a separate site to explore these issues from a Christian worldview, but perhaps it would be best to start here and find out if there would be any interest in this kind of resource for both these men and the women they’re married to. There are “resources” out there on the Internet, but they’re decidedly from a non-Christian perspective.
Anyway, I thought I’d gather thoughts and perspectives here before I went any further.
This thread is interesting, to say the least. So when would a dating/engaged couple, both virgins for instance, decide maybe he was bigger than average? Or is that something that would only come up after marriage? What if he was a large, over 6 ft tall guy, and she was small and petite, would that be a sign he might be larger than average, or does stature not really make a difference? Ok, I have no experience, just voicing curiosity here!
Good question, Brynna.
This is where the solid adage of open communication is key.
I think the communication needs to be safe without judgment or embarrassment. How to bring this up? This is tricky…If both are virgins, how would they know unless the parents share with them about what to expect in the marriage bed (particularly the bride to bed).
If afterward, this is where the sex will dictate if there is pain from being too big.
Tall and short has nothing to do with penis sizes…There are short men who are well-endowed and there are tall men who are not.
Is there really any guy (teenage boy) out there who hasn’t measured themselves? I know when two of my sons were young teens, they had measured themselves, at their own initiative, and then were comparing measurements with one another, and then asked their dad “how big” he was. Maybe all boys/families are not as open as we have experienced, but I would guess that the vast majority of boys/guys/men know where they fall on the measurement scale…and their sexual experience has nothing to do with it.
I never measured myself until I was in adult age. I think this depends on the man. Sadly, with the advent of porn, I’m sure the size issue has made teen boys measure more and worry if they will ever grow if they are not reaching 6 or 7 inches.
Like SC’s boys I measured myself when I was a teenager. I’m analytical so measuring things is my happy place. I also know that from the tip of my thumb to the first knuckle is roughly an inch and from the base of my palm to the tip of my middle finger is 7 inches.
From a female perspective, I can say that I was concerned with what would fit from the time I first realized the boy part actually had to go inside the girl part and the sperm didn’t just magically jump from the Daddy to the Mommy when they laid down on the bed together. (Made me a whole lot more relaxed about nap time at the babysitter after that, at least.)* I can remember having a burning and long-lasting curiosity to know what it would feel like to have something in there, so by the time I noticed my DH (then-boyfriend)’s erection for me the first time, I would have noticed if he had been frighteningly over-sized. (Fortunately, he is only regular over-sized. 😉 ) My point is, you don’t have to do any unwrapping to make some fair guesses about this particular wedding package (pun very much intended). Any half-way mutually attracted couple is going to have a fair idea of what to expect, just by looking at the draping of the denim or the khaki.
*I might have heard some of the medical facts a little too young.
Honestly I feel that as a christian the issue about size should not be a problem at all provided the couple are faithful Christians. By faithful christian , I am referring to Christians who do not fornicate and are living to please God. Whether he is big or small, God created him and God surely created the woman he will marry. The two of them will fit together. A christian man prays for God to direct him to his wife ( a woman created by God for the man) God knows who will marry who. In the beginning God made Adam and later made Eve and gave Eve to Adam to marry. She became his help mate. (helping him in sexual matters too , so he will not burn.
Size issues may arise when the woman has fornicated and therefore has experience with some size. Comparison will set in. Same with the man too. Secondly, men like to view and compare sizes. If a man did not view another man, how did he notice his size? If a woman did not engage in sex and seen sizes how did the size issue start. When we fall, the devil troubles mankind with unnecessary issues.
A virgin female who has not watched porn will not have any issue with penis size. Her husbands penis maybe the first penis she is seeing and the only one she is enjoying. A virgin man who has not watched porn and seen other penis will not have issue with penis size. He will appreciate and cherish his penis.
Is there a genuine size issue? God created us all and we are wonderfully and beautifully made. Yes there are different size of penis and body parts in general. Medical science tells us that the vagina can accommodate any size of penis whether great or small. The mind is also a very powerful sex organ. The mind will prompt that’s a good size and its going to be nice enjoying it or that’s small or too big etc.
If a baby can be delivered through the vagina, then the big size issue is defeated.
The bottom line is, God created us and He created our spouse too. He made us beautiful and wonderful. Therefore we will surely suit each other if we read His word and be doers of His word. Anybody who has failed in any way can get connected to God again and trust that God will fix …….
“If a baby can be delivered through the vagina, the big size issue is defeated.”
Please note this statement:
“A study published in the May 2005 issue of the British Journal of Obstetrics & Gynecology included 50 women. The study found that the vaginal canal of these women ranged between 2.5 inches and 4.9 inches in length…The longest vaginal canal, from the vaginal opening to cervix was only 4.9 inches. The average length was right around 3.5 inches…
Like a man’s penis grows during an erection, a woman’s vaginal canal can nearly double in length during intercourse. This means, the maximum length of the vaginal canal, for the average of the women in the study would be just under 7 inches. That’s max.
Which means, if your penis is longer than 7 inches, you could be hitting your partner’s cervix, if you’re not careful. This isn’t the most pleasant sensation for many women.” – Kimberly Wylie