What do you think about sexual massage instructional videos?
What do you all think about these videos? My DW loves being touched. We were on a long highway drive recently, and a little touching turned into a lot. She leaned back with her legs spread and nothing on down there, and I just enjoyed exploring her for an hour. I wasn’t even giving it my full attention (I was driving!) but she talked about how wonderful it was for days.
I stumbled on some instructional videos for sexual massage from a sex toy review online. They’re based on kama sutra massage practices, but without that spiritualism. I watched some of the videos for massaging a man to get an idea of what it was, and I think that type of instruction would help me take what I did to the next level. And I already know it would be a big deal for my DW.
BUT of course the nudity. I’m not sure how I feel about that. It’s a very sexual one-way massage. In the video on the man, I was thinking the whole time how amazing it would be for DW to do that to me. It’s marketed to couples to do together, but according to the about page, the presenter also offers these massages as a professional service. Watching her stroke a random guy’s penis like that was a little odd, even though the goal is to teach DW and I to do that to each other.
I’ve seen naked women in birthing videos with DW, but of course those aren’t sexual at all. I’ve never watched porn. I’m not sure how I should feel about watching a video of someone massaging a woman’s breasts and every nook and cranny of her genitals, even though I know it would help me pleasure my wife.
What do you all think about this?
On the actual videos you are speaking of, I believe they are a “bad idea”. Though it may not be porn, it definitely can be a gateway into porn. It’s walking through a door of “permission”, and soon you may find yourself giving “permission” to other types of vides to watch and “to learn”. I just heard around the statistic of more women watching porn, that they often start watching for a different purpose than men, then they get hooked. They start “to learn, to be educated, and curiosity”.
I agree with SC. To quote the robot on the old Lost in Space series back in the day “Danger, Will Robinson”. I think there are some good materials available that teach massage without the nudity. You can then use your own creativity to go further in exploration of what kind of massaging you both would find pleasurable.
Why add the temptation to your marriage bed? Why not avoid it go on your own journey together with your spouse? What is the desire that would drive that? There is nothing you can see that you can’t find and learn via less titillating mediums.
I think it’s a gateway drug and not necessary. There are so many ways to learn massage techniques if one, or both, of you are serious without the nudity. Books, youtube, and other reputable internet sites, that’ll demonstrate via pic or video massage techniques, without the erotica. Learn that and then add your own sensual or erotic techniques and experiences. If you really desire to grow your skills, you can even read about those types of massages as well, so why put the mental pics in you or your wife’s brain?
As SC already shared, you can learn basic massage techniques from MELT and I believe he’s also working on a full body massage.
Ask your spouse to see if she’d like to go on a journey with you. Get MELT….get a massage table…do some research together. Part of the sensual massage is the experience you set up and give, not the parts you massage. You can be quick and careless or you can be slow and sensual….elongating the experience with time, atmosphere and connection. A great massage is about connecting with the person. To me, there’s nothing worse than a masseuse who is just sloppy, quick and careless. I love it when a masseuse just starts by just laying there hands on me, touching key points along the body, connecting our breathing for 30-60 sec before adding oil and strokes.
A great sensual massage starts by slowly and deliberately connecting with your spouse, taking your time and never rushing the process. If I get our massage table out, it’s at minimum a 30 min back and legs focus…and ALWAYS the face ’cause DW loves that! If I do full body, it’s 45-55 minutes and if we’re talking an erotic & intimate massage coupled with those things, we could be adding another 15-25 minutes on top of what we’ve already done.
There used to be a blog type site where a Christian husband posted regularly. He had an amazing article about massage, both sexual and non. Seems like his wife had a blog also. Their names are escaping me, but maybe this will jog someone’s memory.
There best thing was it was instructional and written, no pics, no video.