What do you think about this philosophy on “How to treat a woman”?
DD is watching Psych for the 487th time and I just heard Shawn give his advice on how to treat a woman. Shawn Spencer and his father just agreed that a man should treat a woman “first like a woman, then like a princess, then like a Greek goddess, and then like a woman again.”
Ladies, would you like that?
Gentlemen, have you tried that?
I’m also not sure what those all mean or why they are arranged like that. I can tell you though, that I like to be treated like a woman and like a queen, but would not like to be treated like how I imagine a Greek goddess and a princess would be treated. The women I know that act/are treated like princesses do not appeal to me at all and I suspect being treated like a Greek goddess would be even worse.
I don’t know what Psych is, or who Shawn Spencer is (or his father). Consequently, I know I’m coming at this from a place of complete ignorance, so feel free to disregard my thoughts if they make no sense 😄.
My overriding thought is: Surely any such statement is highly dependent upon how each person may define “… like a woman”, “… like a princess”, etc.
For example, what does it mean to treat someone “like a woman”?
For some, it may mean to dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to them, as to the weaker vessel (as per1 Peter 3:7).
For others, it might mean an expectation that the female should get in the kitchen and serve, and keep the house in order.
Some may define it as doing things that romance and woo her.
Still, for others, it could mean to walk on eggshells around her (ie. say/ask as little as possible to avoid any argument and subsequent drama).
I could keep going, but I think you get the idea. There are many possible ways to define the concept of treating someone “like a woman” (or princess, or goddess). If you leave it up to the individual to use their own definition, then your results will be very inconsistent across different people.
I’m not sure exactly what Mr Spencer was communicating with his statement. Perhaps just a general encouragement to treat her as something special, valued, precious? If that is the case, then YES! I would certainly like that (who wouldn’t?!).
On the other hand, if it’s some kind of progression through different stages, which circle back around to the starting point, I’m not sure what the point of it is? To progressively build her up and make her feel wonderful… and then put her back in her place (as a “woman”) again? I don’t know, I’m just trying to make sense of it (clearly I don’t really understand it 🙂).
I’m not sure I ever totally understood it either, but it was in the context of winning the affection of a woman he (Henry, the father) was very interested in. I guess I took it as getting to know her and treating her very special and adored but ultimately not forgetting who she is as a person.
Obviously I wouldn’t advise anyone to build their philosophy on relationships from something a character on a TV show said. OTOH, characters say what writers write, and some writers might be wise and share something they have learned from a lifetime of experience (and possibly even walk with God, although that’s seldom likely in the entertainment industry) through the words of their characters.
Just wondered if this was one of those times. Apparently not!! 😀
It’s interesting that you see being treated like a queen as favorable but a princess not. Both royal, both “beloved by all”, and a princess is theoretically a future queen. The big difference that comes to mind is that a queen has maturity and power where a princess is often indulged but doesn’t really have any say in her own life. In that case, I quite agree! Definitely Queen!
Although I’ve always been partial to that saying, “I know that I’m a Princess, because my Father is the King of Kings.” (Then I add, and my husband is a Prince among men!)
I’m with Brynna on this, I didn’t want to marry a princess (my def: “an entitled brat”). I DID want to marry a woman and treat her like a queen…although I sometimes will wonder if I’m her king or a Royal subject. 😀 (just kidding babe).
Now admittedly, if my lovely DW wife wants to play the role of Aphrodite/Venus, I’m more that willing to be her humble servant! 😀
The Biblical model is always best IMO. There are no mentions of queens or princesses there, certainly not goddesses as examples to follow. Just virtuous wives deserving respect and compassionate leadership by loving husbands. One doesn’t have to wonder how the Proverbs 31 wife was treated by her husband.
For those wondering, my idea of being treated like a queen is this. My DH will ask me for my input. When I am working with him, he will tell me that I can quit early and go in. He honors (mostly!) my requests. He sends me off with the nicest vehicle, even though the others are plenty good enough for me. I do a lot of work outside. He makes sure I have the stuff to do it with, choosing above and beyond what I ever would have bought for myself. He’ll ask what I want for my birthday and when I tell him, he says thats not a birthday gift. When I have my period, even though I don’t suffer like many women do, he tells me to take the day off. And the list could go on. Ha, ok, when I read this all, I think he is treating me like a woman, actually! Maybe the two are the same.
If my husband treated me like a princess, this is how I imagine it. I would stay in bed as long as I wanted and he would bring me coffee in bed. I would mention my work that needed doing and he would hire someone. It would take me all morning to get ready for the day. I would be carefully made up and hands white and it would be fairly obvious that my lot in life was to be spoiled and pampered. To onlookers, it would be fairly obvious that my lot in life was to be the spoiled wife of my husband. And I would know how to whine and manipulate to get what I wanted, all without lifting a finger. It would also have other people saying, ‘whatever does she do all the time?’ And all the while, I would be gorgeously dressed and have the perfect figure.