Would you/Do you ML when your children have friends sleeping over?
I thought about this while answering “Sex Time and Schedule” because we tend to have a lot of sleepovers at our house during the summer.
Funny story, when I was 9 or 10, myself and 2 others were sleeping over at a friend’s apartment. It was a small space, just a 2 bedroom. Her parents had gone to bed but we stayed up late. At some point we heard some noises. My friend said we could hear better if we put drinking glasses to the wall. Needless to say, her mom was either getting a great massage or her H really knew what he was doing. We spent that night giggling like crazy and couldn’t keep a straight face at the breakfast table the next morning. I could not bring myself to look her parents in the eye and if I looked at my friends, we’d start laughing, so I just stared at my bowl of cereal the entire time.
In my own marriage, I have been caught by my son…. and it was baaaaddddd. Probably more for my H and I than my son, he was only 6. I was on top with my rear end facing the door… the door we supposedly locked. We did not even know how long he was there because we didn’t hear the door open. And things had gotten… aggressive (in a good way) at that point… and the naughtiness level was waaaaayyyy high… and hands and mouths were EVERYWHERE. Since then, we double check the lock and move a leather bench in front of the door.
I could not imagine that happening with someone else’s child! I’d be mortified!!!
We don’t make a lot of noise, although we are starting to more. We lived in a very small house for years and usually had a baby sleeping with us in our room, in a bassinet. So we learned to be quiet! We can even do it in a motel room, with children in other bed, although we leave off the intercourse.
We had our neighbor’s daughter over for our daughter’s sleepover. We had ML still and I had to keep quiet (*grumble, grumble*) yet we stil go ahead. There is no need to be ashamed because we are married.
I also LOL JB at the situation regarding your son…of course, this wouldn’t be funny getting caught!
I didn’t worry so much, but my husband was in the absolutely not category. I think he was worried about being naked if an emergency or something happened. And I do admit, other people’s kids always seemed high maintenance (vomiting, needing to call their mom about something, asking for food, etc.) It always made me grateful for my own children!
It was more of a hyper awareness of being nude with others’ children in the house than about having sex.
My DH is very sensitive about this kind of thing and I have long been working on him to help him relax. (It’s to the point I wasn’t positive we were going to have sex any more after DD came along. If she hadn’t started out as a totally unaware baby so he could get used to it gradually, I don’t know…)
That’s why it was such a super hot jump-start to our sex life when we were in a hotel with DD in the next bed a while back and I managed to get him horny enough to stop arguing when I told him, “she’s a very sound sleeper, we’ll be quiet, she’ll never know!” I was right and OMG (-osh) it started a Sexual Renaissance at our house!
If things are getting routine, or it’s not happening often enough, I highly recommend choosing one hangup and overcoming it. It’s a great way to start something good. (You have to work to keep it going, but a start is a good thing.)