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Swallowing advice/ how to?

Use of mouth on each other for foreplay or climax.
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camfan
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Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by camfan »

First brief background and the question, then more background for those interested.

My amazing wife recently has started letting me finish in her mouth. This has happened three times and each time she has spit on my stomach. She hasn't really wanted to spit and she's not a gagging exactly either, but I don’t know how to explain it better. She would like to be able to swallow and is wondering if it is possible to swallow without removing my penis from her mouth? (We were talking about this tonight at dinner.)

In doing a little research her, I saw one post that suggested timing swallows with spurts. Any other advice? And specifically around swallowing without removing the penis from your mouth.

Background: we are in our 40s and have been married 24 years. Before we got married she told me I she would never let me finish in her mouth and asked if was I okay with that. I was okay with it though I knew it was something I wanted to experience. A couple years ago she told me she wished she could do that for me. Then, a couple months ago, while experiencing ‘that time of the month’ she 'took care of me' one night. She warned, “I’m a little tired, so it’s not going to be anything special.” Well, it’s always special, so what did I care? Usually when she takes care of me it’s orally and she finishes with her hand(s). Sometimes it’s “just” a handjob.

Well the night in question was amazing. I could feel my orgasm building and I was losing my mind because she wasn’t stopping and I couldn’t hold it any longer and she kept going. Then she spit on my stomach and- get this- said she was sorry! LOL…I’m like practically in tears because I just had the most amazing orgasm of my life and was so thankful…we had a good laugh about all of it after the fact, but she genuinely felt bad. She wants it to be more elegant. That night she wasn’t planning on doing it but had been wanting to and in the moment decided to go for it.

In my research I found this reply I made to a post about a sexual “blank check” from 2019 which was kind of cool to read in retrospect: “If the question were worded ‘and would want to’ or ‘and would enjoy’ instead of ‘not allowed to refuse,’ I would have her let me finish in her mouth.

We've talked about this and she'd like to do it, but struggles with a gag reflex. She's done it with flavored condoms and come really close on some occasions. I appreciate the desire and all that she gives and wouldn't want her to feel forced. I honestly believe that she will do this someday.
David
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by David »

The only advice I can really give is to keep trying.
It sounds like your wife *wants* to learn to swallow, which is probably more than half the battle.
Brynna
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by Brynna »

If she is wanting to swallow, my only advice is just do it! If she doesn't have a gag reflex, this might just be a different kind of reflex. I have an automatic 'spit it out'reflex, that happens with absolutely anything unexpected in my mouth. Even with food. So the first time DH surprised us both and finished in my mouth, I did some fast thinking lol. I was suffering a sore back so I couldn't get up very fast to spit. I just figured it would be easier to swallow. But I am not sure if that time I swallowed around his penis or if it was left in.
firefly
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by firefly »

My DW has the same problem. She wants too, but can't seem to do so when the moment of ejaculation happens. She begins to gag. Which is odd to me, because she has no problem after sex licking and sucking the remains off of me.
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by SeekingChange »

I noticed that if it is deposited further back in the mouth/throat, where swallowing is automatic and there was no taste or texture to deal with, it was easier. But it can be very difficult to get the timing and placing right with that.

Also, if it's possible for her, she could try to frequently swallow during OS, which helps it to be more automatic when it's needed. For me, the gagging is usually triggered when there is taste and texture sitting in my mouth and my mind has to try to decide what to do. The longer the semen sits in my mouth, the more difficult it becomes.

I am no expert on this, because it is not something I have overcome. Those suggestions were things I did that I noticed helped a little and made for a slightly better experience (which is different than a "good" experience ;) )
God can change what people do, behavioral patterns that have been in play for decades. He can change what we do to cope, to find comfort, to survive conflict, to count. Rahab had done a same old thing for years... and then she did something new.
camfan
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by camfan »

Thanks to everyone who has replied so far. Much appreciated!
research_360
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Re: Swallowing advice/ how to?

Post by research_360 »

There are not many taste buds beyond the back of the tongue. Therefore, deep fellatio (deepthroat) offers the advantage of minimizing or eliminating the taste of semen. Approximately 1/3 of people don't have a gag reflex so they can sometimes train for deepthroat without major problems. The remaining 2/3 of people have a gag reflex, some have a very sensitive gag reflex, making training significantly more difficult. Nonetheless, virtually anyone can train for increased depth and/or deepthroat with the proper training methods.

I didn't like smoked salmon before I met my DW. It seems slimy and gross. But my DW liked smoked salmon. My love for her gave me an openness to try smoked salmon for myself. I slowly acclimated to it over time. Fast forward 11 years... my DW and I enjoy eating smoked salmon together on a fairly regular basis. I tend to believe that love can sometimes transform us in surprising ways. I hope that you and your spouse continue to love one another - with optimism and openness - and positively transform one another. :D
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