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Creativity after childbirth

How do pregnancy and the first year after birth impact a couples sexuality?
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Joma1113
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Creativity after childbirth

Post by Joma1113 »

My wife and I are expecting our second child in a few months. After our first was born, she would offer me OS or use her hands on me. What are some other ways you have done things while waiting for healing?

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Beccaloo
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by Beccaloo »

Between breasts. If she's breast feeding after a feeding will feel much better than while engorged.
Between the thighs.
Pretty much anywhere that gives that closeness but that your DW doesn't have to exert any energy that she really doesn't have.
one_woman_man
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by one_woman_man »

@Beccaloo, those are exactly the things I would have said! I have good memories of trying various things!
Ron
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by Ron »

Sex wasn't on my wife's mind much after giving birth and I don't think for most women it is.  We didn't do a lot until several weeks later.
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by Deleted User 1388 »

Sorry, but I got nothing for you short of what you mentioned already.  The only thing I could think of is lying naked in bed with each other during those multiple times when the baby is not sleeping.  The baby could be brought back to bed and the three of you could all be together.  Naked.  Some parents are opposed to this so it doesn't work for everyone.
Marbles
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by Marbles »

We didn’t do anything sexual until I was ready. Usually by five weeks after vaginal delivery I was ready to resume, but it took six weeks after my c-sections.
one_woman_man
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by one_woman_man »

It was during those days that DW got a lot better of handjobs and suckjobs. In addition to what was mentioned above, we also explored sliding between butt cheeks!
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Thomas
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by Thomas »

Why not let your wife please you with a masturbation sleeve like the Fleshlight?
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SeekingChange
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by SeekingChange »

Our reality was quite different after the birth of all our kids, it was an exhausting time of trying to adjust to a new human being and personality added to our family. We never did anything during my healing time...did I say I was exhausted? He was welcome to get as creative as he wanted when he took his shower. ;) There's a part of me that hopes a wife will take into account her husband's needs and do what she can, but another part of me wishes a husband would put his wife's needs above his own.

God can change what people do, behavioral patterns that have been in play for decades. He can change what we do to cope, to find comfort, to survive conflict, to count. Rahab had done a same old thing for years... and then she did something new.
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DoveGrey
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Re: Creativity after childbirth

Post by DoveGrey »

Hats off to the wives who offer anything. I couldn't do it.

We jumped the gun with our first and tried to have intercourse at 4 weeks. I was in so much pain that neither of us wanted to try anything remotely sexual until 8 weeks with our second. Plus, we were both so exhausted with two little ones that we just wanted to sleep if we had the option.

I agree with @SC. If there's ever a time to give your wife a break if she wants it, the 6 weeks postpartum is it. The hormones, the exhaustion, the physical healing, the feeling like your body is purely functional and not sexual. You feel like an amorphous blob that leaks everywhere. Simple things like urinating can be painful. You're happy if you've showered in the last 3 days. It's a lot to deal with. I have no idea if my husband took care of himself. I'm just grateful that he gave me the time to adjust.
Wife of 21 years
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