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Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

What is lust? What isn't? How can I guard myself...
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Deleted User 1388

Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by Deleted User 1388 »

The backdrop to this question comes from this podcast put forth by Sheila Wray Gregoire:

https://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2020/12/podcast-can-we-please-put-the-lust-and-modesty-debate-behind-us-for-good/

I think everyone agrees males are more visual than females.  It is the way God created men.  Why do males get blamed for looking at beautiful women and their God created bodies?  Should they?  What should men do instead? What should women do?  Should women be allowed to dress however they want?  Is it OK for women to dress provocatively to accentuate the best parts of their body?  Why should they have to dress modestly to not "tempt" men? What is a Christian response to all of this?

I work in a public school and I am appalled at what parents allow their daughters to wear to school each and every day.  Its one thing to wear tight yoga pants but I see much, much worse.  Administrators ask kids to turn inside out inappropriate material on T-shirts but as far as I can tell, the girls can wear whatever they want and are never asked to change.

I look forward to a spirited debate on this.  My guess is responses will be all over the map.
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newwifenewlife
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by newwifenewlife »

We've already had a few of these discussions this year so I'm just gonna post those. I'm not a fan of the direction she's taken over the past few years.  I've been supportive of some of her stuff over the years because I think it's been helpful to women...just think she's over stepped her bounds some.

https://qna.themarriagebed.com/question/every-mans-battle/

https://qna.themarriagebed.com/question/survey/

https://qna.themarriagebed.com/question/sheila-wray-gregoire-on-love-respect/

 

PS - I'm a little tired of "spirited debates". I've seen too many people take offense to the littlest things...get upset about generalizations (which are usually the case for good reason) and come unhinged rather than accept the norms for most...interpret the sentence or statement through their own personal experience rather than really READ and respond to the question or thought...offer little grace, empathy or ask question to understand.

PSS - I include myself in some of those previous thoughts as well.
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Link+Zelda
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by Link+Zelda »

I'll probably drop some thoughts here later, but for now, here's a related thread (not one that @NWNL linked to) that is worth looking through:

Whose responsibility is it to help keep lust, or the temptation to lust, in check?

Oh, and this thread is also worth a read:

Bikinis and modesty…thoughts

-Scott
-Link+Zelda
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newwifenewlife
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by newwifenewlife »

Thanks for the additions Scott. I just did a Sheila G search.

 
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JLoydH
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by JLoydH »

I'm sitting this one out.  I could only hang with 10 minutes of that podcast...  I don't care for their frenetic style of communication.

It's got to be hard to come up with something interesting to talk about for an hour every weekday.
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by DoveGrey »

I used to follow Sheila, and we were involved in the same Twitter circle quite heavily about 2 years ago.  What started out as a simple women's blog has turned into something that is basically a woman with an ax to grind who is very much into self promotion.  I no longer see her as someone who is working to glorify God alone.   That alone is enough for me to seek Godly advice elsewhere.

I do have opinions on this subject, but I think I've covered them elsewhere on this site in the last couple of months.
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by Deleted User 1388 »

@Scott and @Newwifenewlife:  I feel as if I am being asked to refrain from asking questions that might lead to spirited debate (isn’t that the whole point of a “question” and answer board?) and from asking questions that have been asked in a round about way other times in the last few years even though I wasn’t part of the discussions.  Yes, I know how to do a search.  Yes, I checked out your links.  While there are similarities, for sure, there is enough differences IMO.  People should have the option to answer a question or not, no? Oh, and does BEST ANSWER and ANSWERED preclude other people from answering? I’m fairly new and I don’t understand what those two terms mean.  Shouldn’t the person who asked the question get to answer, BEST ANSWER or can anyone do that?  Its nuts that that people who didn't even ask the question get to say BEST ANSWER.  Thanks for you help and expertise.
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newwifenewlife
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by newwifenewlife »

GG - People do have the right to answer questions. Three respected members of the community responded with their thoughts & opinions. You asked for input & opinions and it seems the input/opinions given are not appreciated.

Also, I didn’t say you couldn’t have any debates. I only said I was tired of “spirited debates” so I contributed to the discussion with stuff from before and background in case you hadn't seen it before (which by your own admission, you've had a hard time searching to find things).  It seems to me you’re reading more into my post than intended…which was part of my why in the PS.

Finally, anyone can vote for best answer BUT the original poster can change that so feel free to do that. Sometimes people other than the author mark it on purpose because of the value they see in the contribution, other times it's done accidentally while scrolling quickly, usually on a phone to which they correct.

Deleted User 1388

Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by Deleted User 1388 »

I did not know this information on answers.  Thank you!
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Re: Shaming men who look. Who is to blame?

Post by Link+Zelda »

The problem with the accidental best answers is that even the person that marked said "best answer" can't change it...only the OP can.

-Scott
-Link+Zelda
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