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Wedding disasters

Stuff that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with sex.
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Irnmyk
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Wedding disasters

Post by Irnmyk »

So, this category needs a thread - one for about-to-be newlyweds to consider.

When much younger, as both a wedding choir member and a part time employee of a wedding caterer, I picked up on the fact that every wedding has its glitch, foible, some kind of disaster.

Weddings are emotionally charged affairs. Be it the bride or the groom, or the brides mother (some stories there, too), any small thing going awry instantly becomes a crisis. And, sometimes, they aren't small things, either.

I learned when at weddings, to look for the glitch. It's been interesting. I'll start with two to get us kicked off:

First, once when I was a choir member, the groom's wedding band, carried down the aisle by some kid barely old enough (and with attention span enough) to find his way down the aisle, had been tied to the pillow that the child was carrying to keep it from getting lost. When the groom's ring was asked for, and the pillow handed to the bride, evidently whomever had tied it to the pillow had tied it with a hard knot.

What should have taken just 2-3 seconds to untie and place upon his finger became a pause, a long pause, and even though it may have been less than a full minute, it was painfully WAY too long, as she picked, and picked at that knot as we all leaned forward in our seats.

I began to chuckle, picking up on that this may be the glitch that I had been prejudiced to look for, when the choir director, facing the ceremony, and sweating the wedding band untying process with the rest of us, wheeled, and pointed to me and demanded "did you do this?". I replied, no, but I wish I had been the one to think this one up. He didn't seem to appreciate that answer.

For the second one, a visiting Minister that I knew, but not well was officiating at our church to conduct the wedding for a relative of his that attended our church. He had always, the times that I had heard him preach, struck me as a little sissy. He had a soft spoken demeanor, and a bit of a sort of lisp that made him sound effeminate.

Well, during the ceremony, a candelabra that had some kind of floral arrangement associated with it off to his left, caught fire. The burning floral arrangement blazed up pretty big, and looked like it was going to set the curtains on the stage on fire. It was not a small deal - this was a real blaze.

He, this Minister, seeing the audience react to it, turned, saw what was happening, handed his Bible to the bride or groom, and walked over, in his Tux, grabbed the blazing candelabra/floral arrangement and chunked the whole thing into the baptistry right behind where the ceremony was taking place.

Then he reached out, took his Bible back, and continued like nothing had happened.

What a man. I did some checking afterward and found out that prior to his entry into the ministry, he had been a military drill instructor. Oh, how wrong first impressions can be.

So, what are some of your really good wedding glitch stories that you can contribute here?
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Stack
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by Stack »

For the funny one:
One of our good friends was contractor deployed overseas for an extended time. In order for him to not feel as left out from all the events, we carried a large picture of him and set it up during different activities. It was a fun way to include him and let him know we missed him. Well, one of us in the group got married while he was gone. Knowing that they were about to do bridal photos, for fun we set up the photo of our friend on stage in the background peeking out of some of the decorations. Sure enough, in some of the photos he's peeking out making him look like he was spying on everyone. Well, things got busy and we forgot to retrieve him before the wedding. Not only was he up on stage but people were asking and circulating rumors that he was some loved one who had passed away. Then the bride spotted him as she walked down the aisle...

Fortunately, the bride thought it was funny.

For the practical one:
During my wedding we had something that was forgotten back at the house and the person who went to retrieve it almost didn't make it back in time. For one of my best friends, the hair stylist had to go back and get something then on the way back her driver got into an accident. He was "fine" for being in an accident that totaled a car. The hair stylist was "fine" for being in the back seat (side impact by front driver wheel). But the wedding was delayed for an HOUR because of the drama. The hair stylist insisted on making it and doing the hair of at least the bride. Then at a relatives wedding, the maid of honor left to get something with plenty of time except her car broke down. Someone went to get her and she made it in time but it added UNBELIEVABLE stress to the bride.

Since then, every engagement I hear about I tell them "have at least two runners that don't mind missing the wedding but that you trust to leave at the drop of a hat to go fetch something. Don't send ANYONE who is doing ANYTHING with the wedding. Only these two people should be on stand by with the responsibility of having a working car. If they don't make it back in time due to traffic, accident, or other then it is a 'meh'. And if you don't have anyone, send me." At least one wedding they took me up on the offer and there were things forgotten that I had to retrieve (made it!). And several others have taken my advice although only once am I aware of someone not making it due to traffic (I was thanked by the bride on that one as the mother-of-the-bride was insistent that she go at first and would have been stuck in that traffic had she gone).
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hastentheday
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by hastentheday »

I have an EXCELLENT wedding disaster story but if I wrote it down here, just in case I am anonymous, I would no longer be. Everyone, I mean everyone in my circle, knows the story! So, best to be untold here.
Last edited by hastentheday on Wed Mar 10, 2021 10:08 am, edited 1 time in total.
2 Timothy 1:7 "For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
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intrepides96
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by intrepides96 »

Our wedding was outdoors. We had pretty much everything in order.

A few months prior to the wedding, the building we were going to have the reception at (50 ft away from where the wedding ceremony) burned down . We changed the reception venue to our church...no big deal.

While setting up the audio equipment for the bridal chorus and the wedding march music, we realized that power had been completely shut off due to the fire!

We scrambled to set-up a power inverter connected to my best man's car to try and power the equipment, but the power inverter was DOA. :shock:

Guests started arriving while I'm still up front in jeans and t-shirt trying to get the system going!

While best man and I were running to go get changed and come back, he had to block my view of DW sitting in a car in her wedding dress.

Thankfully, I had a friend who was already going to play trumpet voluntary. My dad spoke with him and asked if he could play the bridal chorus and wedding march by ear on the trumpet and he did perfectly!

In the end, I wouldn't have it any other way. Much better than canned music any day!
Doug
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by Doug »

I wouldn't call it a disaster, so much as just thinking on your feet, but it involves my marriage to DW.
Since most everybody there was military, and more than a few from my own platoon, it was pretty certain that there were going to be some shenanigans. Right after the wedding, DW and I went out to get in the car, and it was barely visible under all the shaving cream and all the other "decorations". It certainly wasn't drivable the way it was, and I had no interest in detouring to a car wash while in dress blues. I happened to notice a buddy of mines vehicle. It was an open top Jeep, and it was sitting there with the keys in the ignition. I returned it to him the next day. He was a true friend, because he just took it in stride and never said a word.
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Duchess
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by Duchess »

Not a disaster, just interesting: We once attended an evening wedding where the weather was becoming a bit fussy. Just as the Pastor and Groom emerged and took their places, a HUGE thunder BOOM shook the church. We all kind of took it as a signal that the Lord had "arrived" for the ceremony.
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MrsNerd
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Re: Wedding disasters

Post by MrsNerd »

Attended a wedding at a quaint old church in the middle of a town. It was a hot day, so the windows were cracked open. As a woman went up to sing a solo during the ceremony, an ice cream truck decided to come down that street, blaring its music the entire way. The wedding, wedding party, soloist all stood awkwardly and waited til the ice cream truck was out of earshot before continuing.

Also have seen many fainting bridesmaids/groomsmen.
*~אני לדודי ודודי לי~*
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